[ it's not that ronan doesn't want to say i love you out loud. it's that, in his mind, he's already said it out loud in a hundred different ways. it's that he's scared, despite everything pointing to the contrary, that adam won't say it back. he's pretty sure adam knows it, but sometimes he really, really wants to say it. like right now, for instance.
fortunately, he has just enough wherewithal not to blurt it after adam kisses him and gives him that smirk, the one that makes his stomach swoop, especially when his hands are in such close proximity to his cock. it's difficult to look away after that, when he can still feel the impression of adam's teeth on his lips, but even if it weren't a matter of safety, he's compelled to keep his eyes straight ahead just because adam said so. there's not much he wouldn't do just because adam said so. sometimes it's a game, and sometimes it's the undeniable sway adam holds over him, what with ronan's heart in the palm of his hand.
and then his cock is in adam's hand, and it has pretty much the same effect. he prides himself on keeping the speed steady even as his pulse races. his breathing has sped up too, and heat zips up and down his spine, pleasure coiling tighter and tighter in the pit of him with every stroke of adam's fist. at first he thinks it's just going to be this, adam jerking him off while he tries not to crash the car, which is already a thrilling challenge, but then adam leans over and the next thing ronan feels is his tongue, and ronan swears, loudly, as he takes his foot off the gas—only because if he didn't, he might've accidentally crushed the pedal to the floor. ]
Jesus, shit, fuck.
[ if adam wanted to see him squirm, consider that wish granted. ronan doesn't fare much better when adam's whole mouth covers him and pulls him in. the breath rushes out of him as his hips jerk forward and his shoulders slide down the seat an inch. he scrambles for the threads of his control, pulling them together enough to regain the speed they lost. they didn't drop enough that he has to shift, which is good since his hand is still in adam's hair, gripping it tightly but too tightly that it hinder adam's movement. god forbid. ]
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fortunately, he has just enough wherewithal not to blurt it after adam kisses him and gives him that smirk, the one that makes his stomach swoop, especially when his hands are in such close proximity to his cock. it's difficult to look away after that, when he can still feel the impression of adam's teeth on his lips, but even if it weren't a matter of safety, he's compelled to keep his eyes straight ahead just because adam said so. there's not much he wouldn't do just because adam said so. sometimes it's a game, and sometimes it's the undeniable sway adam holds over him, what with ronan's heart in the palm of his hand.
and then his cock is in adam's hand, and it has pretty much the same effect. he prides himself on keeping the speed steady even as his pulse races. his breathing has sped up too, and heat zips up and down his spine, pleasure coiling tighter and tighter in the pit of him with every stroke of adam's fist. at first he thinks it's just going to be this, adam jerking him off while he tries not to crash the car, which is already a thrilling challenge, but then adam leans over and the next thing ronan feels is his tongue, and ronan swears, loudly, as he takes his foot off the gas—only because if he didn't, he might've accidentally crushed the pedal to the floor. ]
Jesus, shit, fuck.
[ if adam wanted to see him squirm, consider that wish granted. ronan doesn't fare much better when adam's whole mouth covers him and pulls him in. the breath rushes out of him as his hips jerk forward and his shoulders slide down the seat an inch. he scrambles for the threads of his control, pulling them together enough to regain the speed they lost. they didn't drop enough that he has to shift, which is good since his hand is still in adam's hair, gripping it tightly but too tightly that it hinder adam's movement. god forbid. ]